Christmas Spirit
by Flyer
Summary: Lex Luthor remembers Christmas.


Disclaimer: do not own

A/N: Merry Christmas!

**Christmas Spirit  
**

Lex would do anything for her. There were never any limits when it came to her. Chloe was his and he made the sure the world knew it. Of course, he knew that he shouldn't care that the world knew that she was his as long as Chloe knew that she was his; but his ego would never allow him to not mark her somehow. That was his mistake with Lana. He never showed her that she was his. Lex never forced the issue because he mistakenly thought that it was enough that his ring was on her finger and that she was pregnant with his child. Eventually, he did mark her; and no matter what she or Clark Kent thought, the world would only ever know Lana Lang as his.

Despite all this, he knew that Chloe Sullivan was different. It was why he no longer insisted upon letting a professional decorator come and put the trimmings on their Christmas tree. He chuckled softly in his chair. _"She loves Christmas."_ It was because of that fact that he had a beautiful tree imported and he and Chloe decorated it themselves.

It was only a matter of time from there that her infectious glee became his own. He looked forward to the holiday with all of the zeal of a child. Luthor family gatherings were always civil, but they were never festive occasions. His father made sure of that. Lex could easily remember the sadness that leaked from his mother's eyes when she thought no one was looking. Lex knew that at some point in time they had to have been happy. It was in the occasional way that Lionel sometimes looked taken aback when things went so horribly wrong between them.

It was not hard to remember his vows at the time. Lex would never let that reality become his own. At the time, he thought that he would rather be alone and miserable than to force someone else to endure what would only ever be a holiday of pain and emptiness. It was odd that so much hope was placed in one day in winter, arbitrarily designated the birth of Christ, but having more in common with the Pagans so ruthlessly destroyed by Christian zeal. _"Out of blood comes birth."_

The way Lex saw it, one day shouldn't be the time where people put on masks to hide deep dissatisfaction and loathing for people closest to you; but it didn't matter. He had Chloe. Chloe, who would never, could never fake it with him. It was what he loved about her. She never hid for him. She stood up to him; and not even the torrent of his darkness could bend or snap her. It's what made them work.

Lex glanced to the ceiling. Even now he could feel her energy. It was tangible thing. Kinetic and harsh in its intensity. She burned him like nothing else. His coldness, his hardness were no match for her. Chloe fought him all the way until he yielded; or at the very least, until she could be satisfied with the outcome. And it somehow worked between them.

He let the liquid burn of his scotch burn his throat and glanced at the fire place. The tree made his sitting room come alive where it had been dead. Chloe had chosen this place for it so long ago. His sitting room normally didn't get much traffic. He never invited guests and he never really used the room; but she did. Chloe had come into his life and his home and marked off her territory; but she shared it. She made it theirs. It was an art he never really learned. What was his stayed his and only his stayed his. Lex never had to learn that sometimes the invitation made what was his matter more; but she forced him to learn the lesson, and he had been grateful for it.

Inhaling deeply, Lex let the Christmas tree invade his nose and his breath, learned to appreciate it all anew. The fire crackled lazily in the fireplace. Comfortable and warming. He gazed into the flame and let the light blind him for a time. It was sensation and it was welcome. The table to his side held two mugs, a few cookies, and his scotch.

The mugs were filled with hot chocolate. It was Chloe secret recipe. Their first Christmas together, she had invited Gabe and Lois; intent on making it a true family affair. Because he had no family, she cheerfully said that he would share hers. It didn't matter that he had groused. She saw right through him.

Instead of sulking the entire time, Lex had asked to help her make the hot chocolate. _"The key to fantastic hot chocolate is the hint of nutmeg and mint. Nothing unique, but it is a burst of flavor on the mouth. Also, never forget the small marshmallows. Takes me right back to being a kid."_ There had been the hint of a shadow as she remembered a time when her mother had been home to make it for her; but Chloe shook it off. She had her father and her friends and him. Chloe would never be alone.

Lex hadn't seen the appeal, but it was of no consequence because she had shared something so simple with him, but it was important to her. That was the key to Chloe. All you had to do was make the effort and she would stand by you through hell or high water.

He shuddered in remembrance. That's what he had thought at the time, but he should have known better. Nothing would ever be easy. Lex had thought that they worked, but then she left. Chloe's goodbye had been easy for her. He had seen it in her eyes.

Lex had thought it was going well. He made the effort. He worked hard to give her anything she wanted. She had smiled softly at him. _"I never needed anything but you; and it's the one thing you can't give me. I don't blame you and I never will. This was my fault for not seeing you as you are…and for not wanting to be strong enough to give you what you need."_ Her last kiss had been so gentle. In that moment, Lex had wanted to take her arms and force her to stay; but Chloe was smart before she was anything else, and had brought her father and Clark with her.

And just like that she left him. Not on a Christmas. No, that would've been too tacky; and she was anything but that. Lex had thought that he had marked her for all the world to see; just as he had Lana. He should've known better. Chloe burned the mark on her with her fire. No trace of him remained on her skin…on her soul. Lex knew it to be true whenever he saw her. Chloe found something that would burn with her.

He'd had her followed of course. Lex needed to know if she had someone waiting for her; and to his unending surprise, she had. Chloe had her family and her friends. She was happy. The last report had shown her with a new man in her life. Lex had taken steps to have her life destroyed; but she was one step ahead. Chloe had accumulated enough dirt on him to utterly destroy him. Lex knew that she would never use it unless he forced her to. He very nearly wanted to destroy her just to spite her; but he couldn't. Lex was a survivor before anything else and he could not do it to himself.

The glass in his hand shook and the expensive scotched sloshed onto his business suit, which was rumpled and in disarray on his frame. He'd come straight from a long day of work to trim his tree. To remember her. To feel her once again. To know that her spirit would be as a delicious burn on his skin. He wanted so badly to know it again. It was an addiction that even now left him with the shakes in its absence.

Lex took another sip; and, not for the first, nor the last time, wished that he could burn through her and leave nothing but ash in his wake just like she had him.


End file.
